Dear Annie: I’m about to turn 40 and want to take my family to London to celebrate. Now that COVID has receded and my kids are teenagers, it’s a good time to go. The whole family is excited about this trip.

But my best friend said he wanted to go on a trip with us. My original plan was to make it our family. But she sticks to celebrating our next “Big 4-0” birthday together. This summer is my birthday and autumn is her birthday.

It may be nice for her to be there, but now she’s talking about bringing the whole family. Our children are very different and not friends. To make matters worse, her husband is very annoying. He is in a bad mood and knows everything, and my husband can’t stand him. Not to mention celebrating a special birthday with him, I don’t want to take a vacation with him.

At best, I don’t know how to tell her that only she wants her to participate in a family vacation. -Relevant travelers

Dear Traveler: It’s the sweetness of your friends to celebrate this milestone birthday with you, but she’s now in a nasty position by inviting herself with her whole family. I put it in.

Your family’s trip to London was planned with a purpose. It’s not free for everyone. Create boundaries with your friends and offer alternatives. In between birthdays, it’s a good idea to go on a trip together and keep your London trip in a book as planned to celebrate your 40s with no husband or children. These conversations may seem offensive for now, but when you think about it later, you might think it’s the best birthday gift for you.

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Dear Annie: I’ve been dating my boyfriend for a little over 14 months. We knew each other 30 years ago because we attended the same church. We said nothing but greet each other. Fourteen months ago, I connected on Facebook and started a fairy tale romance. We were very in love and enjoyed spending time with each other.

For the past few months, he has become distant, sometimes frustrated, and emotionally dead. He was never great as long as he expressed his emotions. He is a hard worker and he is not trying to come to see me like he used to. He is a truck driver and runs a landscaping business.

I don’t know if he’s having an affair or if it’s simple. I tried to break up with him about three times, but he didn’t leave. That confuses me. I don’t know what to do, but I’m stupid. I feel like he’s more into him than I am.

I don’t know if I should leave firmly or what to do. Help me. -Am I stupid or naive?

Dear fool or naive: First of all, what do I decide you I want it from him. If you want to dissolve, you need to tell him clearly and directly. If he still doesn’t leave, it may be time to consider legal options such as detention orders.

But don’t write him down because you’re worried about his feelings. Sudden changes in attitude are often a sign of a bigger problem. Tell him that you have noticed a difference in his behavior and ask if there is anything you can do to help. If you still feel amputated, ask him to participate in couple therapy to find the root of the problem.

“How can I forgive an affair partner?” Now out! Annie Lane’s second anthology-featuring your favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication, and reconciliation-is available as a paperback and ebook.visit For more information.

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